Canola Oil vs Olive Oil – Title Match

Time was slipping deep into the night, and the crowd was getting restless as they waited for the main event.

Canola Oil vs Olive Oil

Who was going to come out on top, who would pack the biggest punch?

An interview from earlier in the evening sheds some light into their childhoods.

Canola Oil plans to best Olive Oil with its engineered and manufactured perfection.

With response to this, Olive Oil just laughed and said it was a product of simple natural creation perfected over thousands of years.

Tonight was definitely going to be a slippery slope and the winner could be anyone.

Since Canola had been produced by a team of scientists, it did lose some of its omega-3 during its creation.

Canola believed its rich makeup of polyunsaturated fatty acids would defend against Olive Oil’s ample supply of antioxidants.

When looking at the balance of fatty acids and vitamins, there have been many highlight fights during the night’s progression to enlighten the spectators.

Some included the Soybean Oil vs. Olive Oil match.

Soy had a wonderful uppercut of 7.8g of polyunsaturated fats/tbsp and after Olive Oil’s flury of 10g’s of monounsaturated fats/tbsp and their equally balanced levels of vitamins, it really came down to their childhood, processed vs. natural.

Thinking back to the Canola Oil vs. Corn Oil match, the fans quickly learned there was more to the fatty acids than meets the eye.

Sure they help reduce your risk of heart problems, but cholesterol needs to be accounted for.

With both exceeding over 50ppm (parts per million) of cholesterol, Canola barely made it out alive at three under Corn’s 57ppm.

Olive Oil benefits from this with an almost nonexistent 0.5ppm.

There have been a few ideas developed over the years for picking the winning oil such as: processed or natural, which fatty acids are important for the diet, which vitamins are you lacking in, taste, smoke rate and unfortunately… cost.

That night Olive was stuck in the crowd as it was forced to watch his relative coconut oil, get slammed hard during the Coconut Oil vs. Canola Oil match, only because it was just too fat to move around.

Finishing that round in gloating victory Canola pointed to the crowed and yelled “Everyone has a sweet tooth, but they know their limits.

You don’t stand a chance Olive! No one can bake deserts with you!”

Standing from the crowd Olive yelled in return “People want to be healthy now, and even in these crisis days, they are willing to pay for it!”

Canola Oil vs Olive Oil – Press Conference
In a press conference earlier that week promoting the match, Olive Oil stated that he makes cooking with food quite wonderful and can help fight against many diseases if used in moderation.

Canola dismissed that by saying not everyone has pockets of money to spend on you and your brothers’ Virgin Olive Oil and Extra Virgin Olive Oil.

Sure the health benefits of Olive Oil might be better but I’m the economical choice right now.

Canola Oil vs Olive Oil – Final Annoucements

The loud speaker crackled as the referee announced the long awaited match.

“In the left corner weighing in at 119 calories, 13.5g of total fat including 1.9g of saturated fat, in the dark green shorts OLIVE OIL.

In the right corner weighing in at 120 calories, 14g of total fat including 1g of saturated fat, in the bright yellow shorts CANOLA OIL!

Photo: m_bartosch

 


The bell rang and the Canola Oil vs. Olive Oil title fight was about to begin!

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*This article was penned by guest writer, Adam Chute.

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